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Be all you can be, but it’s not always in the Army. I often see myself as somewhat contented with my life the way things are, but of course it’s hard to think of anything else when where are real issues to be discussed.

Still I aspire for something deeper and more meaningful.

So we’re all pelted with problems. Honestly it shouldn’t even bother or even hinder us to becoming all we ought to be. Aspirations as kids should continue to live within us, even though it would be short-lived or as long as we could hold on to the dream. They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks… or can they?

1. What do I really want?

The question of the ages. So many things you want to do with your life and so little time to even go about during the day.

Find something that you are good at can help realize that small step towards improvement. Diligence is the key to know that it is worth it.

2. Should I really change?

Today’s generation has taken another level of redefining ‘self’, or at least that’s what the kids are saying. Having an army of teenage nieces and nephews has taught me that there are far worse things that they could have had than acne or maybe even promiscuity. So how does that fit into your lifestyle?

If history has taught us one thing, it’s the life that we have gone through. Try to see if partying Seventies style wouldn’t appeal to the younger generation, but dancing is part of partying. Watch them applaud after showing them how to really dance than break their bones in break-dancing.

3. What’s the bright side in all of this?

With so much is happening around us there seem to be no room for even considering that light at the end of the tunnel. We can still see it as something positive without undergoing so much scrutiny. And if it’s a train at the end of the tunnel, take it for a ride and see what makes the world go round!

4. Am I comfortable with what I’m doing?

There’s always the easy way and the right way when it comes to deciding what goes with which shoes, or purse, shirt and whatnot. It doesn’t take a genius to see yourself as someone unique, or else we’ll all be equally the same in everything we do. Variety brings in very interesting and exciting questions to be experimented.

5. Have I done enough for myself?

Have you, or is there something more you want to do? Discontentment in every aspect can be dangerous in large doses, but in small amounts you’ll be able to see and do stuff you could never imagine doing.

6. Am I happy at where I am today?

It’s an unfair question so let it be an answer! You love being a good and loving mom or dad to your kids, then take it up a notch! Your kids will love you forever. The same goes with everyday life!

7. Am I appealing to the opposite sex?

So maybe I don’t have an answer to that, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try it, though. Whether you shape-up, change the way you wear your clothes or hair, or even your attitude towards people, you should always remember it will always be for your own benefit.

8. How much could I have?

I suppose in this case there is no such things on having things too much or too little, but it’s more on how badly you really need it. I’d like to have lots of money, no denying that, but the question is that how much are you willing to work for it?

9. What motivates me?

What motivates you?

It’s an answer you have to find out for yourself. There are so many things that can make everyone happy, but to choose one of the may be the hardest part. It’s not like you can’t have one serving of your favorite food in a buffet and that’s it. Just try it piece by piece.

10. What Really Makes You Tick?

So? What really makes you tick?

You can be just about anything you always wanted to be, but to realize that attaining something that may seem very difficult is already giving up before you even start that journey. Always remember, that self-improvement is not just about the physical or philosophical change you have to undergo, but it’s something that you really want.

Need a little more personal growth, check out this book… you’ll gain more value than you could possibly imagine once you get it in your hands! : CLICK HERE

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Want to learn how you can replicate any state that you have previously experienced? How about being able to re-experience it at will? Well now absolutely anybody can do just that, using these modern, innovative psychological techniques.

There was some sunshine this weekend while I was writing this! At least here on the sunny south coast of England there was. I went out walking along the sea front with my partner Sara on Saturday morning and it was wonderful; the feeling of sunshine on my face, the smell of the air, the sites of other people out and about and happy, the local land train was shuttling people and their excited children back and forth from Bournemouth pier to Boscombe Pier and my senses were filled – a major event for human neurophysiology (mine anyway!)

The funny thing is, later on that evening when my friends were joking about my pink coloured forehead, I told them that I was really looking forward to summer and as I spoke, I felt the sun on me, imagined the fun I was going to have on the beach, remembered the smell, the amazing feeling of joy that I get from being there, just by anticipating it all.

A natural phenomenon we can replicate with NLP techniques. NLP stands for neuro-linguistic programming, which is just a methodology for helping make changes. We shorten it to NLP for easy understanding.

Without realising it, the time I had spent on the sea front earlier that day had acted as an anchor for the wonderful experience which immediately followed it. The next time I saw & heard the experience, albeit in my mind, my neurology went “I know what happens now” and started to produce the intense physical responses that it ‘knew’ were coming next.

In the field of NLP, an anchor is any representation in the human nervous system that triggers any other representation. For instance, the word ‘sex’ will immediately trigger images, sounds etc associated with that word. The word ‘chocolate’ will trigger different associations. I am not too sure which of those will create the most intense feelings though! These words are anchors. Anchors do not have to be words, they can be a wide range of things.

With NLP, we identify that anchors can operate in any representational system (ie. sight, sound, feeling, smell, taste.) Let me give you some examples;

Tonal: By that, I mean for example, the special way a certain person has of saying your name, like when a friend or family member says it. My mother shouting my name from the depths of my home when I was a child often signalled the fact that she had discovered something that I had done that meant trouble for me! “Adam!” often made me feel what I was in store for.

Tactile: The effect of a certain type of handshake for example, or the sensation of a reassuring hug compared to a loving cuddle. Rekindles all kinds of wonderful feelings.

Visual: The way people respond to certain items of clothing. I recently had lunch with a group of my friends from the town where I grew up and several of them commented on the jacket I was wearing. Now, whenever they see it, it reminds them of those comments and makes them smile.

Olfactory: Like when you smell a certain kind of food being cooked can suddenly have you remembering a time when you were in the school cafeteria.

Gustatory: The taste of your favourite food or the way certain foods can make you remember how you felt when you had it before. Maybe like when you were given soup and a big helping of love and sympathy when you were young and off school because you were poorly. I know every time I eat Heinz Tomato soup it reminds me of just that.

Once again, in the field of NLP, an anchor is any representation in the human nervous system that triggers any other representation. It is conceptually similar to Pavlovian conditioning (ie. bells and salivating dogs; some of Pavlovs findings feature in the field of NLP.

While the anchor I created for the sea front was unintentional, it is possible for you to use this NLP tecnique to anchor yourself intentionally. Have a go at this and learn this NLP technique for yourself……

Fistly, think of an occasion when you had a highly pleasurable, positive or enjoyable experience. See what you saw then (looking out through your own eyes), hear what you heard and feel what you felt. As you feel the sensations increase in intensity, squeeze the thumb & forefinger of your left hand gently together for a few moments, then release them. Now ‘break your state’ (Eg. by remembering what you had for lunch yesterday.) Squeeze your thumb & forefinger together again, gently pulsing them. The state will return.

To make the most of anchoring with NLP, it is important to really engage in the experience and make it wonderfully vivid in your mind and to then also put effort into recalling it when you first activate your NLP anchor for a few times. Imagine how powerful this can be when you want to feel wonderful if you are home, feeling gloomy. Instead of reaching for the chocolate, you can start to activate your “feel good” anchor.

Every time you want to get motivated to exercise, just activate your enthusiasm anchor. It is a really simple technique of NLP.

This is a simple but powerful NLP technique that can enable you to have access to the states and resources you want, when you want them. The use of thumb & forefinger is an example of a tactile anchor, but you can use any representation to anchor something for yourself or someone else.

Guidelines for setting anchors with NLP;

In order to get a ‘strong’ anchor for an experience, it is important to

a) Ensure that you have a powerful example of the experience to work with.

b) Anchor in as many representational systems as possible (visual, auditory, kinaesthetic, etc).

c) Set the anchor just before the experience peaks.

d) When you activate the anchor, do it accurately. Be precise!

e) With tactile (kinaesthetic) anchors, pulsing the anchor can help to maintain the experience

One of the people who came on one of my NLP training courses was particularly taken with the idea of anchoring. Shortly after the NLP training, one morning his wife offered to make him a cup of tea, and as she did so, he gently tapped the side of his cup with his ring. He repeated this the next few times she made him a cup of tea. After a while, all he had to do was tap the side of his cup subtly with his ring & she would spontaneously offer to get him a cup of tea!! Very Naughty use of NLP, Eh?! Just by creating a sensory representation (tapping the cup) that coincided with her making tea, he was soon able to use that representation as a trigger for what he wanted. He did eventually share his NLP anchoring experience with his wife and you can be sure he makes a lot more tea than she does now!

Now I know that by now some of you may be thinking “But isn’t that manipulative?!?” One answer is “Yes, so use it for doing good stuff!”
Another answer is “no.” It is no more manipulative than making yourself look good and smell nice when you go out. In those situations you are trying to get people to think the best of you and have a good response to you, a response that you are attempting to anchor through your choice of clothing, grooming and smelly perfume.

Here are some of the sorts of things that I go out of my way to use NLP to anchor whenever I see them or experience them:

- Smiles.

- Laughter.

- Excitement

- Confidence

- Good feelings

- Good performance (especially by waiters & waitresses!)

- Anything that looks good, useful or fun; Achievement and success are especially useful for stopping smoking, reducing weight or growing in confidence.

It’s happening all the time anyway:

As I said at the beginning, anchoring with NLP is a naturally occurring phenomenon anyway. You are exposed to it all the time in everything you do. Everyone is doing this stuff all the time, often without really knowing it. All I am inviting you to do is to become conscious of the anchors that you and others are setting (maybe using NLP), and to start using them purposefully to get good results, rather than randomly to get whatever you get. Use NLP with mindfulness.

Taking this a step further;

Recently, I was working with a team of related staff members with regards to doing some NLP consulting with them. I asked them how they would know that the two days had been a great success. One of them said it would have a ‘feel good factor’ and simultaneously made a gesture with both hands towards his tummy. When I repeated the words ‘feel good factor’ to him, he nodded in confirmation. Later on, I referred to the feel good factor, and simultaneously used his gesture. Instead of a nod of confirmation, I got a full physiological response, including skin colour changes, posture and energy changes…the full works. His words had been a good anchor, but the words plus the gesture were far more complete. When I used both, I got a full response. I continued to use the anchor throughout the consultation. At no time was he aware that I was using NLP & his anchors – he just had the experience of being really well understood.

You can use NLP anchors to capture and re-use positive experiences for yourself & others. Now have a go at doing this NLP exercise too…

1) Think of an occasion when you had a highly pleasurable, positive or enjoyable experience. See what you saw then (looking out through your own eyes), hear what you heard and feel what you felt. As you feel the sensations increase in intensity, squeeze the thumb & forefinger of your left hand gently together for a few moments, then release them. Now ‘break your state’ (Eg. by remembering what shoe you put on first today.) Squeeze your thumb & forefinger together again, gently pulsing them. The state will return.

2) Identify something that someone you know already does, and create a subtle anchor. Set the anchor while they are doing the activity. Later, fire your NLP anchor and see what happens. If they do the thing you anchored, then it worked!

3) When you (or someone you are with) are experiencing something you want to have more of, anchor it.

As usual, remember that this stuff is powerful so use your NLP skills wisely. As well, allow yourself to start becoming aware of when it is being used on you. Advertisers, politicians and stand-up comedians all know the power of NLP anchors and use them with great cunning (and to great effect.) Awareness with NLP is the key – have fun.

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Go to your local newsstand and pick up magazines you wouldn’t ever read and read them for ideas, connections and trends. This is an often repeated example of using outside stimulus as a way to jumpstart our creativity. This article is an example of someone following this process to heighten creativity.

Read essays, articles, or books on creativity and you will more than once you will read that you can heighten your creativity and create new ideas by reading magazines that you wouldn’t typically read. The suggestion is to go to your local newsstand and pick up magazines you wouldn’t ever read and read them for ideas, connections and trends.

This is an often repeated example of using outside stimulus as a way to jumpstart our creativity.

I have read this suggestion many times. I’ve suggested it myself. I’ve even done it a few times. But I’ve never seen anyone show someone an example of doing it.

Until now.

Earlier this week I found the April edition of Wired Magazine in my briefcase as I traveled. I had picked it up a couple of weeks before in an airport because I was drawn to the cover, which suggested that the main focus of the issue was “The New World of Games.”

While I am not a current subscriber to Wired Magazine (used to be) and you might not be either, I think you will find both the process and my results enlightening and fun.

My Process

Reading a magazine for creative insights is pretty easy. Get a magazine, a highlighter, and perhaps some paper or your Journal. Then begin reading. Don’t skim or read only the things that are immediately or naturally interesting to you. Read everything. Read the articles AND the ads. And while you are reading, be asking yourself things like…

What does this remind me of?
How does this relate to my situation, problem or challenge?
What did they do that I can do?
How could I use this?
How can I learn from the experiences or suggestions in the article (or ad)?

These certainly aren’t the only questions you can ask, but they are enough to get you started. You can go into this creative journey with a very specific challenge or problem in mind, or you can just do it to see what serendipitous ideas you generate – either way is fine!

In this case, my journey was a random one – I wasn’t thinking about a specific issue or challenge, I was just reading to see what I might find.

How to Read the Rest of This Article

The rest of this article will provide some of my ideas and what spurred them. I encourage you to read on observing my process and seeing what ideas or insights you get from my insights. In other words, I encourage you to use the process I just described on the rest of this article!

You may also decide to go to the library and get the April 2006 Wired Magazine to see all of what I am describing.

My Journey

… page 26 – a side bar asks the question, “Is a half hour show too long for today’s viewers?” Three people answer with different perspectives. My first reaction is that this is an interesting question…. And my second was that the answers given basically come down to the quality of the story. If a good story is told, people will watch (hey, we sat through 3 + hours for Titanic!) So while this is an interesting question, it is a bit backwards. The relevant question is, how good the story? This relates to my work in terms of training – how long do people want to learn at one sitting, etc. Do I think that times are changing? Sure I do. But people are still people. They will worry less about time is they are engaged. In the end – whether through story or great interaction in a learning situation, the right question is how can we engage people, not how long is the experience.

… page 29 – Lexus presents a four page advertisement for a PBS series with Charlie Rose. It contains very interesting excerpts from two shows in the series. This content was so compelling to be almost worth the price of the magazine itself – far better than many articles I have read in the past. It reminds me that advertising can be relevant and that when we educate and inform others in a valuable way, we might do a better job of marketing, persuading, or selling, than by trying to market, persuade or sell.

… page 56 – talks about a feature film based on a Beastie Boys concert. This movie was created from footage recorded by 50 fans from cameras the band gave them for the length of the concert to film their entire experience. Over 100 hours of raw amateur footage was edited together for this movie. Though I don’t own a Beastie Boys album and haven’t been to their one of their concerts, I am completely captivated by this idea! It appeals to me because the band got this idea and implemented it (the collection of the footage) in 3 days – from conception to footage. 3 Days. This has been challenging my thoughts about how long it takes me to implement or being willing to implement something . . . fast. It also speaks to the power of getting your Customers involved in the experience of your product or service. This two thirds of a page has had me thinking a lot in the last few days.

… page 66 the Play section of the magazine shows pictures and brief descriptions of new products. One on this page is called the Storm Tracker (This is an umbrella that has a bulb at the end of the handle that collects forecast information from local forecasts (wirelessly) and tells you if you need to carry it, based on how much it blinks. The more it blinks, (up to 100 times per minute) the more likely rain will fall. While I don’t see many people paying $99 for this, I was intrigued by the use of a small “non computer” device to give us data that we might be able to use. While I don’t design products like this, I am fascinated by how these types of technologies might be able to aid, impact or influence performance and learning in the future. The Storm Tracker has opened my eyes to be watching and thinking about this question.

These examples get me through less that half of the magazine, and I didn’t even share all of my insights from the first 66 pages!

Rather than continue in this article, I encourage you to read more on my blog, as I will be sharing more of these snippets there.

I hope that riding along on my journey has been interesting, and I hope that you got an insight or two through my examples above. More than that though, I hope that I have convinced you to pick up a magazine you’ve never read before, and try this process for yourself. If you do, I promise you will learn something, and you may solve a vexing problem or identify an amazing opportunity along the way.

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This article will deal with what is on the inside of us. Who we are on the inside, seems to show up on the outside no matter how hard we try to hide it

Greetings self-help readers,

This article will deal with what is on the inside of us. Who we are on the inside, seems to show up on the outside no matter how hard we try to hide it. You have no doubt heard of people wearing their hearts on their sleeves and this is because what is in our hearts are some deep emotions. You can be the best actor/actress in the world but if you are hurting inside you are in bad emotional shape. You can mask your pain with a smile or a laugh but that pain is still there. You can not make that pain disappear with alcohol or drugs it simply returns when the narcotic is out of the system. Medication will also need to be constantly taken if one is on anti-depressants. Why? Because the heart itself, what is on the inside of every single person on this planet is never dealt with. God speaks of people who honor Him with their lips but their hearts are far from Him. God knows what is inside of all of us. The choice can be to run from who we are. To pour ourselves into various addictions to get away from who we are. We must however deal with who we really are if we are to move past any pain in our lives.

Before my darling mother passed away, she uttered the words it is time to move on to my wife and I. Those words were very hard to hear but they still ring true today as I am reminded of them when I reflect back on my last days with her. I could have chosen to stay in the emotional state of numbness that I was in during her last days on earth or proceed to keep all the great memories of my mother in my heart and enyoy the rest of the time that God has given me on the earth. The choice was mine. It was a difficult one but one that I believe that all of us must make when it comes to dealing with who we are. If I chose to stay in a state of numbness and deal with it by working too much or withdrawl I would too busy focusing on myself. I would miss out on spending time with my amazing wife and daughter and I would never be able to get that time back.

Take a look at who you are inside. Talk about the pain with someone you can trust and move on. You can do it. You must do it if you are to be the very best that you can be. Choose not to live in the past because you will miss the very future that God has planned for you.

Much continued positive attitude success,

Bob

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Greetings self help reader,

Are you constantly bombarded by thoughts of negativity? Plagued by feelings of insecurity? Do you see everything in a negative manner? The reason for this lies deep within your heart. You are what you mentally and spiritually eat. If a person drinks alchohol on a daily basis, odds are their body will be affected in some way. They may have liver issues, develop cancer or incur some other type of health problem directly related to the amount of alcohol they have consumed. In the same way, a person who constantly feeds themselves negative thoughts will simply turn into a negative person.

This is the time to go on a diet. A diet of positive attitude food. You have to literally stop feeding your mind negative things. Ask yourself is this thought negative or positive or negative? What do negative thoughts look like? Well, they start with can’t rather than can, no as opposed to yes, will and not won’t. The Bible which is the greatest self help book ever written, speaks about taking every thought captive. The problem in our society has become that our thoughts have taken us captive. We have begun to let our thoughts control us.

A great way to know what we are negative about is to ask those people who are closest to us. You can ask your spouse
or another person in your life who really knows you how they would rate your attitude on a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being super positive and 1 super negative. Ask this person to be totally honest with you. You will benefit from their honesty even if it causes you pain. Ask this person what it is that you specifically say that they perceive as negative. Write down what they say and look at the actual words. Now is the time to be honest with yourself. Those words are a reflection of what is inside you. They are who you are. The great thing is that you can change. It is as simple as making a choice to do so. You must decide to replace the thoughts of negativity with thoughts of positivity. Decide what words you will change the negative words on your paper to. Once you have done this, make an effort to insert these new positive thoughts in your mind. You will begin to notice a positive change taking place in your life. Your family, friends and co-workers will all notice it as well. They may not know what is different about you. But they will know that you are not the same person that you were.

The items which are causing negativity in your life could very well be the news, movies, constantly replaying tragedy in your mind and the list could go on. These things should be eliminated if you want your new mental health regimen to be a success. The news is very negative and does not help someone who is trying to rid their mind of such thoughts. When you are feeding yourself thoughts of death from a war or gunshot or car accident visually the outcome will be negative. I do believe there is a time to grieve over the death of a loved one. However, if a person constantly replays this negative event in their minds it can lead to depression. The person who has passed away is not coming back and we must close that chapter in our lives and move on to the next chapter. This is a difficult task which can only be done by making a decision to proceed with our own life, no matter how hard this may be.

You can do it. You can and will have a positive attitude, if you simply take the steps outlined above. You do not have to be what you were in the past. You can be different in the future. The choice is yours. I know you will make a positive one.

Much continued positive attitude success,

The creator of “Positive Attitude Secrets”

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Every year I go through a period of thought cleansing. I like to reflect, but not to revisit negative experiences, but to draw a road map to a better future for the next year. It allows me to focus, to evaluate my next direction and actions; as well as, how to create more value in a positive and impactful way.

My hope is that this video will find you well. Please, leave your comments, and the cleansing of your thoughts in the comments section on this blog. If you are already on my mailing list, no need to sign up on the list on this blog If your not, and this type of information or, internet entrepreneurialsm peaks your interest, feel free to sign up… it’d be my pleasure to write to you and send you some very useful videos. Ciao for now! Bob

Cleanse Your Negative Thoughts and Allow the Universe to Reward You!

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